The Wendy’s adjacent to the Dover Meat Warehouse has been a fixture since its establishment in 1998, but it is currently undergoing a remarkable revival. Over the past week, an impressive influx of approximately six customers per hour has been gracing the unassuming storefront.
A few simultaneous strokes of luck brought the customers back: First, the McDonald’s kitty-corner from the Wendy’s finally succumbed to multiple OSHA violations (three consecutive 14-year-olds tried to put out massive grease fires using gasoline). Secondly, Eloise Stratum, 98, finally agreed with her daughter and moved into an assisted living facility in Squirrel Gulch. Now that Ms. Stratum is no longer waiting on her porch with her potato gun, the sidewalk between the Meat Warehouse and the Wendy’s is much more hospitable.
As I approached the main counter last week, I stopped for a moment to take a breath and let myself be transported back to 1998, the first time I had walked through those very same doors. I was young and naive, unaware of what life had in store for me, or that would meet a man named Terry. Would those events impact what I chose from the menu? Would I order what I usually got: a Dave’s Double and a chocolate Frosty? Or would I decide to open a new chapter?
Unfortunately, my experience was marred by lackluster service. The cashier didn’t seem heartened by the uptick in customers or excited to be serving the food, making me wonder about the Wendy’s corporate training.
But I wasn’t going to let this derail the entire review. I had a job, and I had come here to do it. No longer blinded by nostalgia goggles (and the sweet memory of my life before Terry), I noticed that some of the promotional posters were peeling, and that the chairs and tables were scuffed. The ketchup dispenser had an unappealing clump, which was unfortunate since ketchup is one of my favorite condiments, second only to ranch.
Without recommendations, I stuck with my go-to order. I’m a woman of standard tastes. There’s nothing wrong with that. My ex-husband (part of the sad life I’ve lived between the opening of this Wendy’s and today. Terry, you rat bastard) always nagged me to make more “exciting” meals for dinner, as if I know what a “jalepeno” is.
The cost of the medium combo was frankly outrageous. My journalistic instincts kicked in, and I asked for documentation on the store’s inventory and food costs. The cashier didn’t understand the question and yet still refused multiple times. I still had a review to write, so I strategically let the matter drop — for now.
Even though I was the only customer and it was 2:13 a.m., it took nearly 30 minutes for my order to be ready. It’s not like I had anything to get back to at home (Terry took the dog in the divorce, the dickhead), but still. Anyway, the food came out and I walked to my car.
“Standard burger stuff. The burger tasted like a burger, and that’s all I ever ask of my burgers.” – Rita Künt-Kingsley, seasoned DUMSTER reviewer
Within the confines of my vehicle, illuminated solely by a solitary functioning streetlamp in the parking lot, I unwrapped my meal. The burger was hot and had the necessary ingredients. I don’t remember what they were, but like tomato and lettuce. You know, standard burger stuff. The burger tasted like a burger, and that’s all I ever ask of my burgers. My ex once took me to the fancy schmancy “burger” place in neighboring Bennd and there was a mushroom and some very strong cheese on it, and I did not care for that at all. They also served fries made out of sweet potatoes! With some sort of sauce they called “allolee” as if that was supposed to mean anything to me. No ketchup or ranch in sight.
The fries here, though, salty. And there were five whole ketchup packets inside, which was the highlight of the meal. I used every one. The frosty, but the time I got to it, was very melted. An upsetting end to a middling meal.
Combined with the lack of acceptable service, I simply can’t recommend the Wendy’s on 14th and Warehouse. Take your business elsewhere, maybe the Denny’s near Hatchfield Park?
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