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    We invite you to join us on our next chapter, sans copyeditors

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We invite you to join us on our next chapter, sans copyeditors

We don't think you'll even notice

by RJ Powerbottom
May 18, 2023
We invite you to join us on our next chapter, sans copyeditors

Natalie Dorn, one of our copyeditors, allegedly doing her job. (Feel free to use this as a notice of termination/DUMSTER)

The following message was composed by RJ Powerbottom, publisher of the Dover Union Merchant Statesman Tribune Enquirer Republic.

Dear Dover readers: This note serves to inform you of a necessary newsroom reorganization. As DUMSTER’s publisher for the past three and a half decades, I have consistently been faced with difficult decisions necessary for securing the continued prosperity of this publication. This sometimes means thinning the herd of fabulous journalists I so benevolently shepherd.

Regrettably, one particular group among you finds themselves rendered redundant. Starting today, our publication will no longer require the dedicated services of copyeditors. Though once an invaluable part of any newsroom, copyeditors have become an old solution to a modern issue — an issue that has been more than adequately addresed by spellcheck technology.

This decision also comes as a result of poor conduct; Unfortunately, our copyeditors seemed to rejoice in hacking apart copy, especially my own.

Unforgettable: On one occasion, I suggested the adoption of a more affirmative linguistic approach during the editing process. Consider, for instance, the substitution of a playful exclamation like “whoopsie-daisy” in lieu of wielding the crimson ink of criticism—such a simple alteration, yet capable of ushering in a world of transformation. Regrettably, my proposal met with resistance and was ultimately dismissed.

That callousness brings us here. In order to run this company in the best, most authentic way we can, we often have to trim fat, and our copyeditors were some of the chewiest bits of waste — figuratively. And let’s face it, a lot of their work wasn’t of pressing importance to our readers.

We do beleive that our work will not impacted by the removal of the copyeditors. DUMSTER is here to serve our readers, exactly as it has for the last 500 years.

Please direct any questions or concerns to HR.

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